Italy sister suicide
by Avllill
Summary: Lovina is lonely, everyone has left her. How does she cope with that? How does her sister, Feli, cope with it? (suck at summaries) Warning! Sad stuff and death. [no pairings]


**T****his is my first fanfiction, so please be nice. I apologize for any grammar faults in advance. **

"You crossed the line, Lovina" He looked at me with a look that was a mix between hatred, annoyance, pity and love before he turned his back against me and started to walk away. "Why...?" I asked with tears in my eyes. He was the last one that ever stayed by my side. I guess my dream will never come true, a dream about everyone standing by my side, smiling... At least I hoped that he would stand there...

But that is a week ago now, no use in sulking over it now, a week since I stopped going to school. No one has called me to see if I was okay, no one knocked on our door to ask why I wasn't going to school. No one ever talked to me this week, not even my Sister. Her room is just across the hall, god damnit! She can be really good at ignoring people.

Well anyway this week I have been thinking about something, it was a hard decision, but have I finally decided to do it. I have heard many people do it before, it was my turn now, not that anyone cared though...

* * *

><p>I went to get my video camera and I thought for a minute of what I was going to say<p>

"My name is Lovina Romana Vargas" I start slowly.

"I am currently going to Roma High School"

"I live with my Sister and Grandpa in a nice house in Italy"

"My sister and I have always had a good relationship, even though we fought a lot and everyone cared about her and not me" I feel the tears in the corners of my eyes, threatening to fall out.

"Lately my relationship with everybody have been going downhill, even with my sister" The tears starts streaming down my face.

"Why? It's a question I have been asking myself for a while now" I sight, the tears are still streaming down my face.

"Are they tired of my cursing? Maybe they think I'm annoying? Maybe I'm ugly?... Maybe they just hate my existence in the whole?" I wipe away some of my tears before I continue "Well, I'm just going to say one thing: Romana haters! Today is your lucky day!"

* * *

><p>I stop the video camera and start walking out of the room. I'm making my way to the front door and put my shoes on. I open the door. It is opening with a creaking noise. I think I hear someone so I run out into the cold weather with my gun under my jacket. I make my way to the school. The wind feels even colder now, I knew I shouldn't really do it, but I have decided.<p>

I see the school now, I haven't seen it in around a week now. It is currently 12.45 on Monday, everybody have classes now. You are probably wondering why I am doing this at school. I'm going to do it here for one reason, and one reason only. I want them to have a reaction.

I make my way to the rooftop and look at the clock. 12.55. I luckily managed to get the rooftop without getting noticed. I'm standing at the edge and look at the clock. 12.59. "1 minute more" I say quietly "1 minute before they come out of the door..." I don't actually mind the others, they can do whatever the hell they want to. All I want is to have Sister and my friend… I mean former friend to see this.

I see the hazel colored hair of my sister. She is standing next to a blond guy and a black haired girl. I also see the brown hair of. He was standing next to a certain albino and a blond haired guy.

The gun feels icy cold against my skin. My hands are shaking as I reach for it. I feel my hand clutch around the handle and pull it out. I'm not thinking anymore, why would I? The tears are falling again. I place the gun at my temple and take a last deep breath as I pull the trigger.

* * *

><p>Everybody looked over to the roof when they heard the gunshot. All they saw was a girl's body falling down. Feliciana and Antonio's face turned white when the saw her falling down, they abandoned their friends and ran towards the corpse. "W-w-why?" Feliciana stuttered, she couldn't believe what was right before her eyes. "L-Lovi?" Antonio's eyes got filled with tears as he leaned down to the corpse and cried. A more people came to look, many recognized her and gasped, there she was, the girl that they haven't cared about, the girl who just was Feli's sister, unimportant, ignored, Lovina Romana Vargas. Dead.<p>

A few days after the incident at the school. Feliciana was sitting in her room, crying. The most important subject lately has been her sister's death. There is different theories about why she did it. Someone said it was because she had problems in her family or something like that, others said it was just because she was plain crazy. There were three people who had a completely different theory, it was their fault... They ignored her, left her, didn't care and she couldn't handle the loneliness and killed herself. These three people was the three people she cared the most about: Feliciana, Antonio and Madeline

* * *

><p>School started a few days ago. I haven't been to school since my sister died. Many of my friends have called me or visited me, but I have just been in my room or at her grave. I nearly stopped eating. If it hadn't been for Ludwig making me eat again, I probably would half dead by now, even though I feel dead. "Feliciana! You have to go to school today!" I hear Grandpa yell from downstairs. I get up from bed and look in the mirror. My eyes are red from crying and my skin is pale as a ghost. My pajamas are hanging loosely on my body. I walk over to the closet and get out my school uniform, the shirt and the skirt is too big. I sigh and walk downstairs. "Morning" I greet grandpa with a monotone voice. He raises an eyebrow at me, but decides not to ask. "So… Is Ludwig going to pick you up?" He asks and continues making breakfast. "I guess..." I shrug and sit down at the table. "What do you have today?" He tries again. "I don't know..." I reply uninterested. He walks over to me and starts poking me "Come on Feli!" He kept on poking me. "STOP IT!" I snap at him. He looks at me with a scared look "What is going on, Feli?" "What do you think?" I look at him fury and sadness in my eyes. "You just have to get over it" he looks at me with pity. "Get over it? GET OVER IT? How I'm I supposed to get over my sister's death?" I yell at him and stomp out of the house.<p>

* * *

><p>"Worst. Morning. EVER!" I yell out in the empty streets. I'm pissed, "How can grandpa be so heartless? Get over my sister's death? Of course I can't get over it... It is all my fault..." I break down crying. I sit there and cry for what I feel like is hours, but is actually just half an hour. I'm still sitting there, crying, as a car appears around the corner. I look up when I hear the car. I stand up wiping my tears away, put on my fake grin and wave. The car stops next to me and I open the door. "Hi, Luddy!" I smile the smile I usually smile when I see Ludwig sitting there. "Hi Feli..." He looks at me a little unsure. I can't blame him, my sister just died and here I'm smiling as the idiot I was. I get in the car and smile a reassuring smile at him. He starts the car and drives to the school.<p>

We arrive at school, we were quiet the whole ride. Ludwig pulls his car into the parking lot and park it at the usual parking spot. Sakura sees us and waves, not in a happy way, but in a reserved and formal way. I return the wave happily, reminding myself to act in front of everyone. I happily smile at everyone as Ludwig, Sakura and I go to our classes. I register who is there, who has been crying and who actually cared.

I sit down beside Elizabeta and Gilbert. I look at the Elizabeta, she have an extra layer of makeup on, probably because she have been crying. I next look at Gilbert, he looks down. "Hey, Gil! Where is Toni?" I asks, remembering that I haven't seen him here. "He haven't been to school for a week... I tried calling but he won't pick up." Gilbert answers, still looking down. "Poor Antonio... This probably hit him hard, since they have been best friends since kindergarten." I think as I take my books out of my bag. We have Italian in first period, lucky. I'm from Italy so this will be easy.

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><p>First period over. The next period is history. "I wonder which country's history we will learn about today?" I ask Sakura, who is also going to have history now. "I don't know, but I hope we learn about Japan" she replies. Sakura's mom is Japanese, so it is pretty obvious she would hope that. "I hope we learn about Italy!" I exclaim. And then I realize what we would learn and I look down "just kidding..." I mutter as we reach the classroom. I sit down next to Sakura and look at the vacant seat next to me. Tears starts forming in my eyes, but I quickly dry them. And then the class starts. "We are having about Canada today" I hear the teacher say, my stomach starts hurting. Maddie, my sister's best friend, is Canadian. She is sitting a few rows from me and she turns to look at me, her eyes are red. "She also feels guilty" I think as I try to concentrate at what the teacher says. But it seems like an impossible task, a least now. I decide that whatever the teacher is talking about is not important so I take out a paper and starts writing. "I won't let anyone see this, not until..." My thoughts trail off, not wanting to think about it.<p>

Second period is done and I meet up with Sakura and Ludwig again. My lunch doesn't taste good, even though it's my favourite food: Pasta. I start stabbing the pasta with my fork, not wanting to eat anything. Unfortunately for me, Ludwig sees this and raise an eyebrow at me. "I'm not hungry anymore" I stand up, walk to the nearest trash can and dump the rest of the pasta in it. Many people look at me when I walk out of the cafeteria.

Third period. Math. I walk slowly to the classroom, and take the note I wrote earlier up from my bag as I sit down at my spot.

"Your skin is cold, your eyes are distant.

You are in a completely different world now.

A world no one can mess up.

A world just for you, your paradise.

My skin is warm, my eyes are watery.

I'm in the world you escaped from.

The world anyone can mess up.

The world for anyone, my hell.

But please sister, wait for me. I'm coming"

A few tears fall down at the paper as I write the last sentence. "I'm sorry". I put the note back in my bag and look up. More pupils had arrived in the classroom when I read through the note. I put my elbows at the desk in front of me and let my face rest in my hands. Ludwig appears in the doorway and I dry my tears. He walks over to me and sits next to me. "Are you okay?" He asks concerned. "Yeah, just a little tired" I try to smile, but instead a grimace appears. "Shit! I hoped I would be able to keep my mask for the whole day" I thought and my face automatically turns into a frown. He looks at me unconvinced face. "Yes, I'm okay! I'm tired, that all!" I snap at him. He looks surprised at me. I don't blame him, it's my first time snapping at someone, well except for grandpa.

* * *

><p>The third period went without any more talking. Fourth period. Science. I have this class with Maddie and Lucy. I sight. "Why science? Well luckily it's the last period" I thought to myself and make my way to the classroom. Lucy is already sitting there as I step into the classroom and Maddie is right behind me. I sit down at the usual spot, and takes my books out of the bag. The teacher comes 10 min to late... Again. And the class starts.<p>

School's finally done. I didn't pay any attention to the science class so I have no idea what they were talking about. But it doesn't matter anyway, today will be my last day in this hell. I take the bus home. I'm just sitting there, thinking. When I finally reach home, I take of my shoes and run to my room. I lock the door and I take my chair, place it beside my bookshelf, climb up at it and take down a box of pills. I look at the pills for a while and decide to lie down in my bed. Before I lie down, I take the note out of my bag and place it on my night table. And then I lie down, taking one pill, another, another, the fourth, and the fifth e.c.t. I feel dizzy and nauseous. I keep on taking the pills, the tenth, eleventh, twelfth. I feel really horrible now, but I continue. Fifteenth, sixteenth, seventeenth... I'm starting to drift off. Eighteenth, nineteenth, twentieth. "I'm coming, sister!" My cautiousness disappears... Forever.

**There! It's done! My first fanfic! Leave a review, please! **


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